Act Cool, Look Cool, Be cool. /// 9:56 AM
i dont understand why some teenage guys like to act as if they dont care about anyone except themselves. there's this one visit to Minds-a centre for those hm.. mentally disabled last friday.
and there's this 3 guys. all looking so slack, so hack-care. it's as if they all have one motto, which is to "
Act cool, Look cool and Be cool." Tattoos everywhere, countless pierced ears, an uncool attitude. they dont even bother interacting with the people (we call them clients) in the centre. just lag behind during outdoor walks, and refuse to participate in all activities. i remember during the walk when it suddenly started raining, one of them even neglected the clients and ran for shelter at the HDB. then he started touching his hair, and checking to see whether his precious hair is all right. as if the hair will fall sick.
seriously.
i dont even know why they volunteered to help out. maybe
not on second thought. maybe they did not volunteer. maybe they are like forced at knife-point or something till they have no choice but to reluctantly agree to make someone else's day.
OK, im not in a very good mood cuz there's school tml and homework still left undone. Has there ever been a point in your life when you feel that life is just senseless. why wake up? why study? why go school? im feeling like that now. oh ya, i've gained 6kg during the hols! can you believe it?! hahahaahahahaha
-Thank You, Lord, for colours of the wind. -
*I dont wanna miss a thing, Aerosmith
23rd June-Karo's birthday. /// 12:30 PM
Went to study and catch a movie with a church mate today. was actually supposed to study all the way, but then temptation seeked in and when jovan said, "I feel like watching silent hill.", you cannot blame us for choosing a really smart choice - to RELAX after about 4 (!!!) hours of homework, chat, homework,chat...
The thing is that i feel maybe im starting to overcome my fear of horror movies. but then this movie wasnt all that scary afterall. maybe just a little gruesome? seriously, i dont recommend watching it.
Looking back this week, i realised i was busy attending lectures, meeting up for discussion of interact club, rushing last-min homework, squeezing in some
important play-time and preparing to flunk my mid-years. sad huh?
It's kind of strange when nobody is at home. it feels weird, lonely. hmm definitely not a good feeling. im not used to it. it's too.. too quiet. better switch on the radio, so that with music rocking in my ears, i dont have to feel lonely anymore. :)
seeya at the zoo tml! :D
-Thank You, Lord, for Sneezy(Karo) in Snow White and the 7 dwarfs. -
*don't let me be the last to know, Britney Spears
You. /// 10:49 AM
sometimes i feel i do not know you anymore.
sometimes i still see the one i've known all along.
And i wish i could just say that it's all over and i dont care.
But i know it's all a lie cuz everytime i see you, nothing else matters.
-Thank You, Lord, for my family. -
*You and I, Jason Mraz
Sec 4C gang. /// 1:09 AM
Was supposed to study yesterday in je library. in the end, after about 2-3 hours of just daydreaming and reading books, cheryl junjie and i met up with eugene where we took our lunch and headed for IMM. went there to develop photos. had a fun time just looking at photos at eugene's laptop and was like laughing all the way. then zhengliang joined us where we took loads of really weird and candid shots.
developed 5 photos in IMM. all contain many memories esp in sec 3 and 4. Of
snow white and the seven dwarfs (an all girls' clique in Sec 4C - miss them so much). Of
me and eileen in mabel's house goofing around. (lovely!) Of my
five closest friends who grew up with me in Secondary school life. (love love love them) And lastly, two photos of
cheryl, jj, eugene, zl and me. taken in IMM. :)
At 7, we went to dine in Crunchy carrots. *the chicken ramen wasn to my liking* btw, the guys are really a bunch of sickos... :P
At 8 plus, we M.R.T.ed to jj's house to take his basketball. while waiting for him to take his ball, we played cards in the playground and guess what? a policeman and several residents in the area walked towards us and asked us what we were doing. i thought i was going to be handcuffed and led away to jail! but then we told him we were waiting for a friend. then he advised us to stop playing and perhaps
sing songs instead while waiting. Imagine 4 lunatics lalala-ing in the middle of the night. haha. and he said the next strangest thing, "Let's take photos!"
!!! Eugene was saying, "Yeah, and we're gonna be on the area's wanted list" hahahahahThen, we cabbed to my house where we called daniel to join us. he biked here. it was already 10 then and the streetlights were switched off. played till 11 plus then a sweaty me went home.
Mum's feeling better already!! :)
the movie, She's the man. /// 12:03 AM
i love the movie "She's the man" more than my mandy moore cd, which i cant live without. it's really hilarious, and the guys are hot! :P
im really worried for my mum. there are three tiny little beasties which grew on her eyes and thus, affects her nerves. it's really scary. every morning, she cannot open her eyes and this morning, she even had to poke one of the tiny thing and pus/blood woozed out. it was really painful for her. it drives me bananas the way she neglected her health. she still intended to go work when she could barely open her swollen eyes. she thought she's the hulk or what? there is only a limit to one's capabilities. tried talking sense into her, encouraging her to take a day off from work. but she refused.
my mum has suffered alot for the family. i love her so much.
SHE'S the man!
-Thank You, Lord, for close friends to confide in. -
*You light up my life, Debby Boone
God helped me forgive her. /// 7:46 AM
i remember being punched in the girls' toilet one fine day. the 'puncher' was a girl in her youth while the 'punching bag' was me. at that time, i was about 12 or 13 years old. i do not know why she did that but i think she was a little unstable. i remembered washing my hands and the next thing i felt was a huge blow in my stomach. i remembered my mum scolding the hell out of her. she just looked down at the ground, not saying anything. And right after that punch, i could not breathe. it was as if my lungs stopped functioning and my stomach kind of deflated. Tears welled up and i felt so embarrassed. Everyone just stared. I think they are afraid of the girl too. if my mum had not been there, there'll be nobody to
hold me as i stumbled out of the bathroom, away from danger.
I forgot all about that incident until today. im not really sure what made me remember it. Oh well.
-Thank You, Lord, for keeping me safe wherever i am. -
*This love, Maroon 5
Church camp. /// 5:31 AM
came back from church camp last night.
was feeling rather down. i guess it's cuz my group did not win and truthfully, im not used to losing. i hate seeing the smiles of my group members drop when they heard that we did not win. it really breaks my heart.
throughout the past days, i was leading a team of mostly young, naughty but eager 'soldiers'. all ready for battle. all eager to win. it was hard at first because some of them were mischievous and always running away during grouptime. but i can tell that as time passed, they grew to be more serious and understanding. they offered to wipe the table after dinner, swept the floor. even though they did all that to gain extra points for our group, at least they are trying :)
I guess i shouldnt have felt sad afterall. since my teammates have enjoyed the camp, i should just be thankful for it, shouldnt I?
-Thank You, Lord, for my group, Kindness. -
*Kiss Goodbye, Lee Hom
Linking of hands /// 12:44 PM
-Thank You, Lord, for that someone who held my hand. -
*Better man, Robbie Williams
do you still love me? /// 12:19 PM
Dear Lord,
Do you still love me? Do you still love me? Do you still love me??
