Walking by faith, not by sight// ♥ Joy ♥

God sent people to help me. /// 2:48 PM

wanna thank you guys for being there for me tonight. i truely appreciate your concern and kindness. feeling better than the crappy feeling i've had just now. love ya loads. :)

Mesy
Yiqi
Wanting
Nelson
Angie
Eileen
Max
Chialing
Mingfen

sweet little beings.

Physics suck! /// 1:14 PM

my world actually fell apart today.

and im smiling no longer. everything you see is just the surface of things.
Beneath it all, i feel just like a crushed piece of useless paper.

-Thank You, Lord, for friends friends and friends. -

*Dont speak

Be thankful for it all. /// 12:53 PM

i cant stop smiling. :)

Did you ever talk to God above? /// 12:18 PM

i love you, Lord...

Have you told him all your cares and woes

Every tiny little fear he knows

You can know He'll always hear and
He will answer prayers

You can whisper in a crowd to Him

You can cry when you're alone with Him

You dont have to pray out loud to Him

He knows your thoughts

On a lofty mountain peak He's there

In a meadow by a stream He's there

Anywhere on earth you go

He's been there from the start.

received progress report today. as expected, i did not do well.

the stupid results seemed to smile gleefully back at me, as if to say that i deserved it all.

Maybe i do. maybe i deserved these crappy marks. afterall, i've taken things too easy during the first semester. it's all my fault!

I love sec 4C. /// 3:27 AM

it's 12.19 now. 19 mins just passed to mark the end of another day. i feel that life is going too fast for me. cant catch up with it.

The day flies by today- captainballing, munching on delicious homemade food, laughing, swan-feeding, catching up on old times and beautiful scenery viewing in botanical gardens. it has changed tremendously since the last time i visited. despite the changes, it's still the place filled with tranquility and old memories. :)
glad to see old classmates again. you know, sometimes, i really wish that i can change time, maybe create a time-machine, and i'll reverse time back to the past. cuz Sec 4C was a class full of love and warmth. everyone just cares for one another. laugh, joke, cry all together.

hmm cant wait to see them again on founder's day service and dinner.

-Thank You, Lord, for today. -

*With all I am

how can my mum ever looked down on me? /// 2:42 PM

my grades are going down the drain. it's really pathetic. my physics has gotten an 'S' grade, which is like ungraded, and i've not passed a single econs and chinese test. i seriously felt like a loser.

and yesterday came the day when even my mum looked down on me. we were arguing and then she said, "I knew right from the start that you cannot make it at all." it's like wham! it hits me right in the heart, like an arrow piercing mercilessly through it. right after she said it, right at that instant, i just looked at her. And a second later, im out of the room. Can you imagine how it feels?
it hurts me so much to hear her say that. anyone can look down on me but not her!!

i refused to talk to her later. but the thing is that she always has a way of making me feel rotten and guilty. in the end, i just pretended that nothing has happened. just have to hide all my feelings in the bottom of my lungs. at least, throughout this ordeal, im really thankful that my friends have been there to support me...

it still hurts deep inside though.

-Thank You, Lord, for your beautiful simple creation. -

*Here without you

Sucky Chinese orals! /// 12:07 PM

SHUCKS.

i screwed up my chinese orals.
had a bad hunch that something like that was gonna happen.

say byebye to any glimpse of hope of improving my chinese. :(

-Thank You, Lord, for clean toilets. -

*Where you belong, Fort minor

Definition of romantic /// 11:50 AM

Today, someone asked me an unusual question:

"How do you define romantic?"

After a long, long time, here's what i said:

"On my wedding day, instead of arriving by the normal way to the church (in a large white merc and a chaffeur), i'd rather come biking up the steps in a stunning gown, on a grand splendid motorbike, with my arms around my husband-to-be." = MY FAIRYTALE. :P

hahahahaa. this is my definition of romantic but they're just hopeful fantasies that would most probably not come true.

Hurray! school only starts at 10 tml. gonna watch world cup with classmates throughout the night. hope it's gonna be a blast!
Tata, mateys! :)

-Thank You, Lord, for giving me shelter from the storm. -

*Because you live

Gaying around. /// 2:53 PM

The day swings by today...

With school ending at 12. however due to my disappointing results, i have to attend an additional econs remedial. after which, i met up with classmates for lunch at jec.
at 4, met eugene to buy a movie to watch at his house. cheryl and zhengliang were supposed to be there too, but they were like hiding away at first, with their cheeky smiles and all. really dunno what tricks they have up their sleeves.

the movie, "Underworld Evolution", was a teeny weeny bit boring. cheryl zl and i fell asleep at least during some parts of the movie but eugene was like so fascinated with whatever is going on. haha. weird taste of movie huh?
and later, both the guys were like gaying around with each other! cheryl and i were standing at one side, looking and laughing at them wrestle for bout half an hour?! it was a really comical sight. eugene was like singing tong hua- his current favourite song - throughout the whole wrestling match. oh my.
Because of stupid curfew, had to leave early and be home by 11 plus. :(

actually, throughout these few days, homework and coming tests are piling at the back of my mind. it's kinda frustrating. i wish.. i wish there'll be more laughter and people to brighten up my days.

-Thank You, Lord, for honey pearl milk tea. -

*Slipping away, Avril Lavign

Another unloved letter. /// 11:28 AM

~~You are caring~~
~~Good-natured~~
~~Funny~~
~~Charming~~
~~you make me smile~~

but i am wiser now
my eyes are wide open
lets move on.

With love,
Joy

JOY the TUTOR. /// 11:17 AM

tutored my first student on Sunday! he was too mischievous and kinda "jikobei", but really smart. cannot even sit still for 5 seconds.

even though im not a World Cup soccer fan, im surprisingly looking forward to watching the semifinals and finals. Italy will win. :D
it's really fun when you're watching with your friends and whenever a ball is kicked into the goal, everyone will shout "GOAL!" as loud as they can and then go around hugging one another. haha. i like the tense atmosphere especially when we hold our breath when the ball is nearing the goalpost. then the moment is released when a ball strikes in. whoohoo! REAL FUN.

Reminder: Alevel chinese orals is coming soon :(

-Thank You, Lord, for 06S16. -

*Lost without you, Delta Goodrem

Busy saturdays. /// 2:51 PM

Saturdays are busy days.

1st thing in the morning, went to church to decorate for tml's special event.
secondly, rushed off to school for interact club stuff.
3rdly, went to meet class to head off for national stadium for national youth day thing.
All these by 12.30!

something weird happened in the bus today. rumours rumours rumours. i just cant seem to escape them, from primary school to now.

saw people i recognised -wanting (same class from pri 3 to 6), rebecca (sec 2D) and erm someone else. still remembered during primary school, wanting ciyuan jiale and i were best of friends in pri 2 and 3. and the silly thing is that we named our group, "The four bandits." :P but our group kinda broke up in pri 4. and it became wanting ciyuan ferarina and me. loved those times when we would go sit under the coconut tree every recess and talk about everything under the sun. :)

hmm the someone else that i saw today makes me think back about the past. i realised something, i did not dare go up to him and say hi is because im just afraid. but now, maybe i should have done so because im not supposed to care anymore. it's all history!

had dinner with 06S16 in Marina Square. saw PJC mates there! :)
ate in BK.
i kinda love my class. :)

-Thank You, Lord, for my cellphone. -

*Sidewalks by Story of the Year

Mabel is Back. /// 1:31 PM

This week, i was late twice. My first two times in my entire life. :(

met up with mabel, eileen and wanling yesterday. too bad chialing isnt there. if not it'll be the 5 of us! oh my, it's seems like a century since i last saw mabel, who went to australia to study but recently she came back during her two-weeks break. presented her with 3 roses and hugged her when we saw her. she hasn change one bit. still the same funky girl that i know! :D
went to dine at Hans where Mabel talked about her life in Australia. it's great that she's having a good time there. then we walked to Taka where we took zillions of silly photos. it was one crazy moment!
hmm realised how much i really miss them.

Oh no, my youth's anniversary is coming this Sunday.
And i had to plan what to say during the service.

Much more to say.Later.

-Thank You, Lord, for preserved guavas. -

*Kissing a fool